23.5.05
haha shitttttt we are the worst drinkers ever. next time, we moderate ourselves and we will last sooo much longer. and i know what went wrong with the jello, we were supposed to put juice! but we didnt we it was strong. and i guess just swallowing them was a bad idea. anyway had a good time! i hope everyone made it home oka!
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22.5.05
so i didnt blog about yesterday! haha SO i find it interesting how all the people who won exec. positions are pretty buddy buddy with the president. coincidence? perhaps! but thats oka! because elections are OVER!!! thank goodness. following that was the carnival which was pretty coolio. my buddy was insaaaaane. in a good way. i got a hug at the end oh ho ho! but i got shunned from vicky's cool buddy group. that cut deep! haha so after the carnival i went and did my grad council duties which consisted of stapling programs! then off to wem with vicky jenny jess and charles! only to get there and meet up with my wifey (sophie) and d^2. so after waiting for 9 minutes because jenny was confused by gloria we departed to t and t! only to have the guys separate at urban outfitters! (theres a sale!) haha so yes tnt they met up with there freeeeends and then me and vicky slipped away to oasis! where she bought a belt and i tried on some coolio fox shorts! and then we debated on buying wristbands but didnt because im too picky =( so after that vicky and i made our way to thrifty's to meet up with my wifey and jessss and we convinced vicky to wear a bright pink super long top! and we all dressed up ish and i saw a super coolio blazer but didnt have the cash for it and it was the onlyt one left so by the time i go on monday it wont be there anymore because it was ON SALE! for forty =( so after that dissapointment i dont remember exactly what happened! but i know i went to winners and found NOTHING! but then went to payless shoes and found shoes! and so did sophie!!! so if all works out well we will BOGO!!! oh ho ho ho oka so after drooling over shoes we met up with d^2 and charles at hoang long outside tnt for deeenar. hmm hmmmmmm theeeen we went back to school! AMAZING!!! haha the dance! dance = drama!!!!! =( but after the drama was resolved everyone had a good time! the lights were trippy and made me feel like seizuring! but we got the dj to play backstreet boys for yufei!! and he danced and sang along! he will deny it if you ask him BUT HE DID!!!! and we got matt to sing along to the night at the roxbury song. yah i dont know the name. haha and they played the whistle song and I DIDNT HAVE A WHISTLE! oh how saddening! and jenny jess and i whored out on the speakers wor double guest passes to teh sisterhood of the travelling pants premier! BUT ITS ON A WEDNESDAY! what a way to luck out!
anyway TODAY! went to the library and none of the books i want to read were there! i probably didnt look right! but there werent and that makes me sad. now i have nothing to read. =( alright time for bed!
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anyway TODAY! went to the library and none of the books i want to read were there! i probably didnt look right! but there werent and that makes me sad. now i have nothing to read. =( alright time for bed!
21.5.05
...
Absolute boredom.at the library. Typing on a cellphone is rather difficult without t9 but that's oka i'm bored. Like the dickens.
18.5.05
hmmmm hmmmmmmmm HMMMMMMMMMMMM i should go finish my homework. i am extrememly tired but i feel restless like it aint no one's business ohhhh OHHHHHH wathed the finale of ANTM (america's next top model) naima won, YAY. i love her style its very street/funk. i need a new style. maybe i'll go pose as a skataaarrrr hahahahaha oka no. yah oh ho h ho ho ho i just started my homework i should feel worried shouldnt i but im not just have to finish up bio and then do two more dialogue journals pour l'anglais!
RANT (optional read):
oka so lets talk about something EVERYONE seems to be fixated on. students's union elections. frankly, i think some people deserve this more than others because they take more crap than they really should ahve to. but in reality i think someone will win only because they've got their friends backing them; this is soooo evident its retarded. more than half of the people who will vote for their friend and dont care about the school because they never do anything anyway. like holy fucking hell! i think if people that ran actually proposed plausible platforms, and if voters took the time to LISTEN to all of the platforms and chose the one that APPEALED to them the most, elections would turn out a lot better. BUT PEOPLE DONT! i think elections should be run on a number system sans names therefore you vote for what really counts, the ideas. and then there is our grade! GAAAH! if you couldnt tell already, that's who im talking about. just because your friend is running doesn't mean you are obli-fucking-gated to vote for them. yah of course you're going to support them but in the end if you dont want to vote for them atleast vote for someone you think can get the job done in the end. haha out school's students's union is soooo corrupt! like jeez its retarded! why not just run a dictatorship and be done with it! i will be sooo happy when this week is over so i can tear down the posters because they are all an eyesore. when i walk down the hallways they dont make me feel like voting for the candidate they make me fall as though im going to fall down and have a seizure.
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RANT (optional read):
oka so lets talk about something EVERYONE seems to be fixated on. students's union elections. frankly, i think some people deserve this more than others because they take more crap than they really should ahve to. but in reality i think someone will win only because they've got their friends backing them; this is soooo evident its retarded. more than half of the people who will vote for their friend and dont care about the school because they never do anything anyway. like holy fucking hell! i think if people that ran actually proposed plausible platforms, and if voters took the time to LISTEN to all of the platforms and chose the one that APPEALED to them the most, elections would turn out a lot better. BUT PEOPLE DONT! i think elections should be run on a number system sans names therefore you vote for what really counts, the ideas. and then there is our grade! GAAAH! if you couldnt tell already, that's who im talking about. just because your friend is running doesn't mean you are obli-fucking-gated to vote for them. yah of course you're going to support them but in the end if you dont want to vote for them atleast vote for someone you think can get the job done in the end. haha out school's students's union is soooo corrupt! like jeez its retarded! why not just run a dictatorship and be done with it! i will be sooo happy when this week is over so i can tear down the posters because they are all an eyesore. when i walk down the hallways they dont make me feel like voting for the candidate they make me fall as though im going to fall down and have a seizure.
16.5.05
anything to....
procrastinate from doing english. what a scary subject that english is! maybe its not the subject maybe its just fahlman and his human condition ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhh well i have two dj's done but they're doth like 4 lines long; hand written annnnd i have almost an intro for my world lit paper except that its like 1/2 of a page long in size nine font double spaced; i think there something wrong with that, it seems kind of long. and apparently i need more than three body paragraphs. no efffffing way, i barely was able to find THREE things to write paragraphs on. gheeeey.
on a side not i talked to an old friend today that was coolio i miss friends like that, too bad we never see each other anymore we used to cheeeel always. those were the good times, but people move on i guess. maybe its like how you buy that super cool shirt but then a couple months later you'll be like "gross". i seem to have been having that happen to me a lot lately. i think it's time to slow down again and re-build friendships and perhaps start studying for finals =(
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on a side not i talked to an old friend today that was coolio i miss friends like that, too bad we never see each other anymore we used to cheeeel always. those were the good times, but people move on i guess. maybe its like how you buy that super cool shirt but then a couple months later you'll be like "gross". i seem to have been having that happen to me a lot lately. i think it's time to slow down again and re-build friendships and perhaps start studying for finals =(
15.5.05
you know its serious when....
you break out the boyz II men and you dont stop listening to it for days. this could be a long one guyssss. brace yourselves. and i thought things were getting bettar tooo. but then, THEN! i watched the last episode of orange days. AND the first two episodes of stariway to heaven. i just fucked myself over. haha i find this quite pathetic, but hye it'll work out and things will be like they were before and i wont have to worry about it. and i'll look back and laugh because this is a waste of my efforts. i should just let myself go for a while. i've been trying too hard to impress. impress who? i dont know.(well i do but its confidential. losers.) things have been changing so quickly. i see myself moving forward but i dont feel legs moving. i reach out to hold onto a moment but i cant hold on. i lose it and just keep moving. why? i kind of wish things were the way they were before. before people decided to outgrow their friends; before people decided that what they belived was the only right answer. maybe i should have tried harder? i dont know. but its at times like these i thank people who arnt afraid to face my grunted answers, verbal lashings and violent outbursts. it's absolutely coolio to have people to talk to. haha shit i should sleep or else i wont wake up tomorrow! and if i dont wake up tomorrow i wont sleep tomorrow night! and if i dont sleep tomorrow night i wont get up on monday! and if i dont get up on monday i'll miss the bus! and if i miss the bus i'll be late for chem! and if im late for chem i will miss the biochem unit (which i havnt started studying for yet! high five!)!
on another note, i let the masses sway me again. i followed the mob and jumped on the bandwagon. i shouldn't have believed that story retarded! well atleast i know the other side now. thats oka i guess, just let them think that and hey things will work out. eventually. maybe.
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on another note, i let the masses sway me again. i followed the mob and jumped on the bandwagon. i shouldn't have believed that story retarded! well atleast i know the other side now. thats oka i guess, just let them think that and hey things will work out. eventually. maybe.
14.5.05
finished...
orange days just now. so sweet. makes me sad. oh well i'll go watch some more saaap. i think my sister has alfie too coolio.
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12.5.05
hmm stabing pains under my left rib cage, what could this mean? throbbing in my left frontal lobe. stinging in my right shoulder. and i feel like puking! harhar this is grrr-reat! oh ho ho ho i dont think i should be allowed to drink coffee or anything caffinated. anyway lets look back on the day!
i hate albertan weather. but i learned i can change in less than a minute. coolio. hmm oka so thennn bus ride yup nothing new there and thennnnnnnnnnnnn elisa test in bio. jon kozel had aids, so according to billy, he was the one that fucked the monkey haha. oka next period! englissh!!! somewhat interesting today? haha didn't do much so maybe that's why. did my english homework yup i had no idea what to annotate but i wrote down lots of questions =) hmm then maaathh. i should start doing homework because i had no idea what was going on in class. i will fail the conics unit on wednesday. (remind me to study). oh welll hmm then lunch! talked to jocey for like two minutes! then went on a walk with vocky, sophie and andrew yang! we talked about the male ego and we concluded that a guy's one ambition in life is to be more successful than his best friend. so far, nothing has proved that wrong. oh ho ho. anyway they bought lunch at checkers we sat and talked and then paul and taylor walked in yup then they left then we left. went to baskin robbins and it was like an osa party house haha. and so we egged vicky on to have a death match with allen and stephen lee and the winner would get vlad! my money is on vicky. hmm its 10:55 i should be tire. im not. fucking mocha. anywaaay oka back to schoooolll chilled in the corner talked somemore about the male ego. then they went to math and i went too yup did my english and my french (wuhoo), then after class matt was talking about how he beat vlad at pushups or soemthing like that i dont remember exactly what it was. but yup, there was that male ego again. hmm oka then went hooome and started to study but then got restless. i drank half the mocha, that was more than i could stomach, so i dumped the rest. anyway! i got restless so i played the piano for the first time in a couple months. it felt good i guess. i dont know i kind of regret it now. but theres no real point in that i sucked at it anyway. oh ho ho oka and then what else? more social studying and what not, watched the oc and then tried to start studying again but didnt! oh well atleast i got an outline done. hmm hmm hmmm i feel too sick to sleep, but i should anyway! oh! so tomorrow! ss essay! (boo) but volleyball after school (yay) absolutely coolio. hmm getting yelled at. i should go. i'll read myself to sleep.
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i hate albertan weather. but i learned i can change in less than a minute. coolio. hmm oka so thennn bus ride yup nothing new there and thennnnnnnnnnnnn elisa test in bio. jon kozel had aids, so according to billy, he was the one that fucked the monkey haha. oka next period! englissh!!! somewhat interesting today? haha didn't do much so maybe that's why. did my english homework yup i had no idea what to annotate but i wrote down lots of questions =) hmm then maaathh. i should start doing homework because i had no idea what was going on in class. i will fail the conics unit on wednesday. (remind me to study). oh welll hmm then lunch! talked to jocey for like two minutes! then went on a walk with vocky, sophie and andrew yang! we talked about the male ego and we concluded that a guy's one ambition in life is to be more successful than his best friend. so far, nothing has proved that wrong. oh ho ho. anyway they bought lunch at checkers we sat and talked and then paul and taylor walked in yup then they left then we left. went to baskin robbins and it was like an osa party house haha. and so we egged vicky on to have a death match with allen and stephen lee and the winner would get vlad! my money is on vicky. hmm its 10:55 i should be tire. im not. fucking mocha. anywaaay oka back to schoooolll chilled in the corner talked somemore about the male ego. then they went to math and i went too yup did my english and my french (wuhoo), then after class matt was talking about how he beat vlad at pushups or soemthing like that i dont remember exactly what it was. but yup, there was that male ego again. hmm oka then went hooome and started to study but then got restless. i drank half the mocha, that was more than i could stomach, so i dumped the rest. anyway! i got restless so i played the piano for the first time in a couple months. it felt good i guess. i dont know i kind of regret it now. but theres no real point in that i sucked at it anyway. oh ho ho oka and then what else? more social studying and what not, watched the oc and then tried to start studying again but didnt! oh well atleast i got an outline done. hmm hmm hmmm i feel too sick to sleep, but i should anyway! oh! so tomorrow! ss essay! (boo) but volleyball after school (yay) absolutely coolio. hmm getting yelled at. i should go. i'll read myself to sleep.
i made a cheap but extremely potent iced mocha after school. atleast 3-4 heaping teaspoons of caramel flavoured instant coffee and an equal amount of hot chocolate. the chocolate didnt help, so i added a lot of honey. its still sitting with me. i will not sleep tonight. but i guess that means more time to study for italian unification! foreign intervention! if its not on the exam i am screwed =)
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11.5.05
if i seem irritable lately don't say anything and just walk away. i feel like beating all of the monkeys, figurative ones of course, off of my back. beware. you have been warned.
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4.5.05
im afraid to go outside but it would be a good time to run in a field until i fall over. i feel so restless, like there is something inside of me trying to break out. i wont let it. it was like i breathed a sigh of relief when it all happened. i should stop holding my breath over trivial things like that. am i just fooling myself? what's going on. i can't even talk about it like fuck seriously. its anxiety, anxiousness, restlessness, jealousy, exhaustion, and apathy all at the same time. how do you handle something like that? the walls are closing in and i cant stop them.
it will pass. it always does, and when it does maybe things will go back to normal. but i have a feeling this could be a long one.
3.5.05
i think i'm jealous. and on top of that i've lost my motivation.
