30.8.05
holy sweet jesus mother of pearl
so the reason is only kind of the fact that she killed the sweater i wore ONCE. like really it was only once and i hadn't even thrown it into the wash yet. it was like a week after her birthday and so i thought i'd be nice. but HOLY FUCK. what a fucking retard. who the hell leaves their shit on the floor right next to their bleaching area. IDIOT MUCH? like seriously, at this age you would think someone would have enough common sense to isolate an area or stuff you dont want to get dirty. and it's not the first time that she's returned something in worse shape than i lent it out in. she cant take care of ANYTHING! my sister is a retard. i have never borrowed anything from her then wrecked it. like if the shits not yours dont go throwing it around like its worth shit all. and she even had the nerve to tell me that she wasnt planning on showing me and that she was just going to give it back to me, like she was doing me some kind of favour by confessing. LIKE THE FUCK I WOULDNT NOTICE BLEACH SPOTS ON MY SWEATER. seriously. i hate the way she thinks she's better than everyone else which then automatically means she can disregard everything you say to her when she's infront of her friends and treat people like crap. fuck i hope she gets beat on in high school, maybe then she'll lose some weight and learn to humble herself. i actually think that she'll drop out of highschool and be a gangwhore.jesus she and that other stupid girl. i can only tolerate them to a certain extent, after that i just want to beat them both. ive never met more retarded kids. it doesnt help when my parents are totally easy going with her and fucking nazis towards me. i still havnt figured out why i always get shafted. what a load of shit. thank god school is starting, once it starts to pick up, i wont have to see or talk to any of them.
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28.8.05
leave it behind.
Holy crap. This summer was seriously one of the best in a long while. Two months of nothing, yet everything all at the same time. Summer school turned out not that bad. After thinking it would be a total bust i ended up sitting infront of one of the coolest kids I've ever met. And I thought I was wild. Yeah, met some other cool kids at summer school too and it completely changed my perspective.
Along with summer school was work. Oh, work. If I were making commission, I would be rich. But I'm not, so I'm still somewhat poor. That's not to say that I don't enjoy working, because I do. It's great, my M.O.Ds are all amazing people and the stories they tell during close are fucking awesome. Not only do the people rock, but so do the clothes and the discount I get on them. Hot indeed.
Then there was SUNIA. Oh god. That week was undeniably unforgettable. As unforgettable as going on unplanned hikes to secret rivers and getting soaked in the rain. Who thought learning would be so much fun. Would you like to see how cool SUNIA really was? Yeah, that's what I thought, so click here
Anyway,I'm still not sure what I want to do with my life and work and stuff, but seriously, I don't think I'll stay here. I'm going to get out and meet people, somewhere completely urbanized. I'm absolutely craving the hardcore city life. I want nights out and coming home at seven in the morning and people I can talk with for hours about stuff that matters. I want to be able to sit in a museum for hours and just wonder what an artist was thinking as they decided to capture a moment in time. Ha. Ha. I'm such a loser.
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Along with summer school was work. Oh, work. If I were making commission, I would be rich. But I'm not, so I'm still somewhat poor. That's not to say that I don't enjoy working, because I do. It's great, my M.O.Ds are all amazing people and the stories they tell during close are fucking awesome. Not only do the people rock, but so do the clothes and the discount I get on them. Hot indeed.
Then there was SUNIA. Oh god. That week was undeniably unforgettable. As unforgettable as going on unplanned hikes to secret rivers and getting soaked in the rain. Who thought learning would be so much fun. Would you like to see how cool SUNIA really was? Yeah, that's what I thought, so click here
Anyway,I'm still not sure what I want to do with my life and work and stuff, but seriously, I don't think I'll stay here. I'm going to get out and meet people, somewhere completely urbanized. I'm absolutely craving the hardcore city life. I want nights out and coming home at seven in the morning and people I can talk with for hours about stuff that matters. I want to be able to sit in a museum for hours and just wonder what an artist was thinking as they decided to capture a moment in time. Ha. Ha. I'm such a loser.
23.8.05
fucking epiphanies.
they sneak up on you. and then its like "fuck." i keep thinking up all these stupid reasons to why im the way i am, and sometimes they actually make sense. i envy so many of the people i meet. i have never more wanted to move away and start over so badly. i dont feel at home with these people, we call ourselves friends, but god, its so retarded. we're only able to talk about certain things and then nothing, or we'll only be able to see each other under certain circumstances. i just want some spontenaiety. it would make things so much more exciting. perhaps the grass is always greener on the otherside. that is, until you make your way over there and see what a load of shit it really is.
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7.8.05
i think im afraid of time and what will come with it. everytime i think about where im headed i just crash. what the fuck.
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